Grocery shopping is like an art- there's a grace involved, an ease that is both subtle and deeply emotional. It's also an extreme sport- it requires speed, stamina, and strength. It can take years to truly master. But you don't have that kind of time, do you?
That's why this blog post is here- to teach you the art of grocery shopping, in less than five minutes. Some of these are 'life hacks,' and some are just helpful hints to help you shop with skill, so you can kill it like you're on Iron Chef when you get back home.
Shall we begin?
1. You Don't Have to be Extra
Can't afford Whole Foods and farmer's markets? Don't sweat it. Safeway and Costco have your back. They've got perfectly awesome grocery options, and your bank account will love you forever. Don't judge yourself for not being an artisanal foodie- that lifestyle's overrated.
*This is actually a tip that I used in my last article, which explains how you can make cooking an enjoyable daily habit, rather than a chore (self-plug, i know, i'm not sorry)
2. Organize that List
Write down the ingredients that you need, one recipe at a time. Label each separate ingredient list. If you need thyme for your spaghetti, then some more thyme for the fish, don't combine them. Write them down in their own respective sections, and highlight them as a little reminder. See here:
Wes Anderson
1 young man with daddy issues
840 symmetrical shots
1+ dead dog(s)
900 detached dialogues
1 pretentious cult following
2 artsy filters
1 Owen Wilson
Quentin Tarantino
1 Samuel L. Jackson
3 relatable badasses
1 historical setting
2+ female feet
2,000 witty lines
1 pretentious cult following
1 self cameo
By doing this, you get an idea for where your ingredients are going. That way, if the store doesn't have something, you'll know whether you can live without it or if there's a replacement that'll go well with the rest of the recipe. You also decrease the chance of accidentally combining similar (but not the same) ingredients, like dried bay leaves and fresh bay leaves (I did that once).
3. Tri-TIPS (haha get it)
You want your meat to be fresh as heck. Duh. But how do you know it's good? Let this unqualified teenager (that's me!) tell you.
- Vibrant color
- Consistent color (no discoloration)
- Free of blood clots or bloody tissue
- Free of bruises
- IT SHOULD BE COLD
- Clean smell (if it's bad, you'll know)
Also, if you're buying tightly wrapped meat, make sure there's no water trapped in the packaging.
4. Lettuce Tell You about Shopping for Veggies (i hate myself)
When buying veggies, avoid frozen stuff if you can. Sure, it's cheaper, but it also tastes about a tenth as good as when it's fresh. Also, veggies are SO REPLACEABLE. Like, so replaceable. So, if you happen to be making a soup with chard, but the chard at Safeway looks wilted, buy kale instead. If the romaine looks bruised, throw spinach into your caesar instead. Don't buy gross greens. Trust me. They aren't worth it.
5. Seafood Suggestions pt. 1
Seafood can be tricky, but as a Japanese San Franciscan, I've picked up some tricks (hi mom and dad). First, if you're not sure what to buy, talk to the dude (or lady, or gender nonconforming friend) behind the fish counter. Ask them what's fresh. In my experience, they won't try to coerce you into emptying your wallet- they really want to help. If you don't trust your local fish market friend, here are a few ways to tell if a fish is good to go.
- Clear eyes
- Red veins (they'll be brown if it's old)
- Bright, shimmery sheen (on whole or fillet fish)
For shellfish, make sure the shell is closed.
6. Seafood Suggestions pt. 2
Looking for cheaper fish? Me too. Through a lengthy experimentation process, I've discovered that there are a lot of extra cuts of fish that you probably didn't know existed, hidden behind the counter. Here's a very short list of cuts to ask your local fishmonger about (at least here in California- if you're further inland, I have no clue if this'll even help, I'm sorry).
- Tuna collar (add salt and leave it in the oven- it's DELICIOUS)
- Salmon belly (they come in strips)
- Ikura (fish eggs- they're tasty, I promise)
- Literally just ask for scraps, they're great for soups and stocks and are super duper cheap
7. Line it Up
When putting your beautifully gathered items on the final conveyer belt, do your bagger a favor; put them in order. What order, you may ask? Durable, heavy items (like nuts, or a melon) should go closest to the register, and the flimsiest, squishiest items (blueberries, green onions) should be the farthest back. This way, the bagger can efficiently bag your bag, without having to rearrange the contents to avoid squishage. They'll love you, and you'll love me.
But if there's no bagger- bag it yourself, lazy. Be a good citizen. Don't make the register person do it.
8. I shouldn't have to say this
SAY THANK YOU TO YOUR REGISTERER. SAY THANK YOU TO THE BAGGER. SAY THANK YOU TO WHOEVER THE FRICKETY FRACK HELPED YOU OUT, INCLUDING THAT TEENAGER WITH THE SAGGY PANTS WHO GOT OUT OF THE WAY SO YOU COULD PUT BACK THE ALMOND MILK THAT WASN'T LOW-CALORIE ENOUGH FOR YOUR TASTE. SCOWL AT NO ONE. SMILE WITHOUT EXPECTING A SMILE IN RETURN. BE HAPPY. BE AS OPEN AND KIND AS ANTHONY BOURDAIN. LOVE YOURSELF. HAVE A GREAT DAY. LIVE LONG AND PROSPER.
I'm sorry for that last rant. Anyway, please let me know what you thought of this article in the comment section below, or fill out the contact form on my home page. If you liked it, please subscribe (I post food/culture related content every day), and check out my last post! I love you!
That's why this blog post is here- to teach you the art of grocery shopping, in less than five minutes. Some of these are 'life hacks,' and some are just helpful hints to help you shop with skill, so you can kill it like you're on Iron Chef when you get back home.
Shall we begin?
1. You Don't Have to be Extra
Can't afford Whole Foods and farmer's markets? Don't sweat it. Safeway and Costco have your back. They've got perfectly awesome grocery options, and your bank account will love you forever. Don't judge yourself for not being an artisanal foodie- that lifestyle's overrated.
*This is actually a tip that I used in my last article, which explains how you can make cooking an enjoyable daily habit, rather than a chore (self-plug, i know, i'm not sorry)
2. Organize that List
Write down the ingredients that you need, one recipe at a time. Label each separate ingredient list. If you need thyme for your spaghetti, then some more thyme for the fish, don't combine them. Write them down in their own respective sections, and highlight them as a little reminder. See here:
Wes Anderson
1 young man with daddy issues
840 symmetrical shots
1+ dead dog(s)
900 detached dialogues
1 pretentious cult following
2 artsy filters
1 Owen Wilson
Quentin Tarantino
1 Samuel L. Jackson
3 relatable badasses
1 historical setting
2+ female feet
2,000 witty lines
1 pretentious cult following
1 self cameo
By doing this, you get an idea for where your ingredients are going. That way, if the store doesn't have something, you'll know whether you can live without it or if there's a replacement that'll go well with the rest of the recipe. You also decrease the chance of accidentally combining similar (but not the same) ingredients, like dried bay leaves and fresh bay leaves (I did that once).
3. Tri-TIPS (haha get it)
You want your meat to be fresh as heck. Duh. But how do you know it's good? Let this unqualified teenager (that's me!) tell you.
- Vibrant color
- Consistent color (no discoloration)
- Free of blood clots or bloody tissue
- Free of bruises
- IT SHOULD BE COLD
- Clean smell (if it's bad, you'll know)
Also, if you're buying tightly wrapped meat, make sure there's no water trapped in the packaging.
4. Lettuce Tell You about Shopping for Veggies (i hate myself)
When buying veggies, avoid frozen stuff if you can. Sure, it's cheaper, but it also tastes about a tenth as good as when it's fresh. Also, veggies are SO REPLACEABLE. Like, so replaceable. So, if you happen to be making a soup with chard, but the chard at Safeway looks wilted, buy kale instead. If the romaine looks bruised, throw spinach into your caesar instead. Don't buy gross greens. Trust me. They aren't worth it.
5. Seafood Suggestions pt. 1
Seafood can be tricky, but as a Japanese San Franciscan, I've picked up some tricks (hi mom and dad). First, if you're not sure what to buy, talk to the dude (or lady, or gender nonconforming friend) behind the fish counter. Ask them what's fresh. In my experience, they won't try to coerce you into emptying your wallet- they really want to help. If you don't trust your local fish market friend, here are a few ways to tell if a fish is good to go.
- Clear eyes
- Red veins (they'll be brown if it's old)
- Bright, shimmery sheen (on whole or fillet fish)
For shellfish, make sure the shell is closed.
6. Seafood Suggestions pt. 2
Looking for cheaper fish? Me too. Through a lengthy experimentation process, I've discovered that there are a lot of extra cuts of fish that you probably didn't know existed, hidden behind the counter. Here's a very short list of cuts to ask your local fishmonger about (at least here in California- if you're further inland, I have no clue if this'll even help, I'm sorry).
- Tuna collar (add salt and leave it in the oven- it's DELICIOUS)
- Salmon belly (they come in strips)
- Ikura (fish eggs- they're tasty, I promise)
- Literally just ask for scraps, they're great for soups and stocks and are super duper cheap
7. Line it Up
When putting your beautifully gathered items on the final conveyer belt, do your bagger a favor; put them in order. What order, you may ask? Durable, heavy items (like nuts, or a melon) should go closest to the register, and the flimsiest, squishiest items (blueberries, green onions) should be the farthest back. This way, the bagger can efficiently bag your bag, without having to rearrange the contents to avoid squishage. They'll love you, and you'll love me.
But if there's no bagger- bag it yourself, lazy. Be a good citizen. Don't make the register person do it.
8. I shouldn't have to say this
SAY THANK YOU TO YOUR REGISTERER. SAY THANK YOU TO THE BAGGER. SAY THANK YOU TO WHOEVER THE FRICKETY FRACK HELPED YOU OUT, INCLUDING THAT TEENAGER WITH THE SAGGY PANTS WHO GOT OUT OF THE WAY SO YOU COULD PUT BACK THE ALMOND MILK THAT WASN'T LOW-CALORIE ENOUGH FOR YOUR TASTE. SCOWL AT NO ONE. SMILE WITHOUT EXPECTING A SMILE IN RETURN. BE HAPPY. BE AS OPEN AND KIND AS ANTHONY BOURDAIN. LOVE YOURSELF. HAVE A GREAT DAY. LIVE LONG AND PROSPER.
I'm sorry for that last rant. Anyway, please let me know what you thought of this article in the comment section below, or fill out the contact form on my home page. If you liked it, please subscribe (I post food/culture related content every day), and check out my last post! I love you!
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